


Adrenaline

by jedjubeed, sanzyfresh



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alcoholism, Depression, M/M, Suicide, boi i die, gaster is unrelated to sans, sans is m' child, sorry no incest here, tw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-06-02 10:49:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6563272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jedjubeed/pseuds/jedjubeed, https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanzyfresh/pseuds/sanzyfresh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sans is fed up. Sans tries to die. Sans is reminded of why he didn't try before.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Jump.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is jedjubeed.tumblr.com, my beta readers is we-can-start-over.tumblr.com (their tumblr is 18+)

He stood above the dark waterfall, the pit descending below him reaching far enough for the bottom to be clouded by the soft rest of darkness, and the grayed mist of the water.

It was quite beautiful, Sans thought, as he took another step dangerously close to the edge of the cliff. Some stones shifted away from his shoe, and fell into the stirring river below.

It was a solaced thought to look down. He looked back up across the ravine. From here, one looking would see Snowdin. He vaguely saw a flittering red past the pristine sparks of the snow. 

 _Papyrus, I'm so sorry._   _I couldn't be strong for you._

_I'm so sorry._

He looked back down into the ravine, grinning as blue-tinted tears rolled down his face.

He let out a soft chuckle, taking a step closer to the edge. Another step, and he'd be plummeting down into the dark water below.

"Hey. What was the first thing that came from a suicide jumper's mind as he landed...?"

He reached up to wipe the sticky tears from his face, though they were quickly replaced.

_I couldn't take care of you._

_This is why I don't keep promises._

"...his ankles."

He offered himself a small, strained chuckle. Looking down into the water, it reminded him a lot of himself. He just wanted all of this to end. He wanted to be happy.

But he knew he couldn't be happy.

So he was doing what he could do to make it finally end. 

He took in a shuddering breath, not stopping his silent tears from collecting at his chin to drop down. 

_You'll forget me._

_You'll hate me._

"ye, P-Papyrus."

And, thus, he took a step forward. He took his hands out of his pockets. He pushed himself forward. He did a lot of things.

It wasn't scary at all.

It was calming.

Everything finally slowed down, and he felt like he was finally at peace with everything.

He could see the dark, rolling water edging nearer and nearer. 

Just as he was about to hit, he must have blacked out. Literally. Everything was black.

Not the type of black where you couldn't see anything. It was just... black.

He looked around, slowly returning his hands to his pockets. It felt as if time froze. 

He could sense a presence nearing, but he tried to stay put as he was. 

He felt a hand on his shoulder. Lulling, familiar. Thin.

"Hello, my dear Sans."

_Dear Sans? No one calls me that but..._

He whipped his head around, staring blankly at the figure before him. He knew he was crying.

"Gaster? you-" He reached up to wipe at his eyes, before swallowing, leaning forward to hug the other tightly.

He felt arms wrapping around him.

"Yes, my love. It is me. Do not worry."  _Please stop crying,_ Sans knew the other wanted to say.

He sobbed softly into the black robes, curling his fingers up into the cloth. 

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I couldn't help you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

He felt a hand running up and down over the back of his spine. It was calming.

"Please, dear. Do calm down." 

He nodded his head slowly, bringing the fabric to his face. He never wanted to leave.

"There is a machine in your laboratory, yes?"

Sans looked up, wiping his tear-stained face with a sleeve. He nodded, staring up into the other's eyes.

"I know you know how to fix it." He felt the arms tighten around him. "Things may not be easy for you, but you should not give up." 

He saw the scientist smile.

He smiled back.

"I will visit you. In your dreams. In the shadows..." Gaster reached up to run his thumb over Sans' cheekbone, wiping away the new formed tears. "I will be here for you. You will never, ever be alone."

Sans reached up to place his hand over the taller skeleton's, looking up inquisitively.

"What... would the machine do?" Gaster laughed at hat, his deep laugh that always made Sans feel like he was falling in love all over again, every single time. And he was.

"My love, would you promise not to tell anyone? Once on, the machine will change the entire timeline." Sans ran his fingers over the holes in the doctor's hands, nodding.

"Course. You can trust me."

Gaster turned his wrist so he could hold Sans' hand.

"You would bring me back. The timeline would reset, my dear Sans. It would be as if none of this ever happened."

Sans' grin slowly widened at this, and he leaned into the other.

"It will take a lot of work. I will grant the resets an inability to affect the lab so you may work."

He closed his eyes, breathing in the scent of the other. He never waned to leave, but he knew how it was.

"I love you. So much." he scientist flinched, but that's all Sans could feel.

"Sometimes I wish you would move on so you could be happy, my dear. But, as long as you love me, I can't help bu say that I love you as well."

That was all Sans needed to hear. He felt like he was lulling to sleep, there in his lover's arms.

Time seemed to reverse before he woke up, lying on the side of the river. Looking up, Sans could see the part of the rock that had broken off.

He examined his surroundings, blearily sitting up. He could see a receding mass of black tendrils.

He slowly pushed himself up, running a hand down his face before slipping his hands back into his pockets.

He felt something, a slip of paper that wasn't there before. He grabbed it curiously, pulling it out to smooth the single crease. In the familiar handwriting of WingDings, he smiled at the message.

_I hope to see you soon, my dear Sans._

He folded it back, returning it to his pocket.

 


	2. Despair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So turns out changing this from a oneshot to a multi-chapter thing was a great idea?

His mood had brightened up by the time he had re-entered Snowdin. He no longer felt so alone, as his former lover's presence was enough to keep him going.

He knew about the machine in the lab, the blueprints, he just didn't think much of it to fix it. Now he was going to do anything and everything in his power to get it done as quickly as possible... but, then again, no one should know it exists.

He had told Papyrus about it, very long ago. Just a small mention, of "hey, bro, there's a broken machine in that outside-access basement."

Papyrus didn't think anything of it.

Papyrus wouldn't ask.

_Papyrus..._

He just tried to throw himself off a cliff.

Did he even bother to leave a note...?

His memory tells him no, but instinct says yes. Either way, he took a frantic shortcut to the living room, and then up the stairs.

_His door was open._

_Fuck._

He all but sprinted into his room, finding his wad of sheets lying on the floor. His desk drawers were thrown open, a notebook lying open on he wood surface. The treadmill was off, and his trash tornado had fallen apart, leaving all its contents to be thrown across the room.

Cautiously, he stepped over all of the mess on his floor, making his way over to the desk.

He stopped as soon as he was standing over it.

_papyrus, i wanna say a lot of things here. but i'm not going to force you to suffer with me. none of this was your fault, ok? you were the best brother anyone could ever have, and you really helped me out. it just wasn't enough. i'm not blaming you for this, just remember that. please remember that this isn't your fault. i love you, papyrus. i love you so much, and i know you're tired of the way i am. i wish i could change, i really, really wish i could be there for you as much as you're there for me. it's hard to even be there for myself. i'm sorry i couldn't be strong like you. i'm so sorry, papyrus. i love you. please don't look for me. i'm guessing by the time you read this, i'd have already dusted myself. please don't be sad. please. i love you. i'm sorry._

He sighed as he read it, the hazy memory flooding back. There was no doubt Papyrus read it. There was no doubt Papyrus was looking for him.

He sighed as he buried his face in his hands, just standing like that for a few seconds.

Carefully, he lowered his left hand into his pocket. He dug around in his pocket for a moment, before pulling out his phone.

He flipped it open, dialed the first number on speed dial. He held it up to where his ear would be, and walked over to slowly sit down on his mattress.

Like always, on the first ring, he heard his brother's familiar voice. It was quieter than he'd ever heard it before, and his soul ached with the tone.

"Sans..? Is that you?" Papyrus' voice was wavering.

"Yeah, it's me. I uh- just..." He paused for a moment, his grip tightening on the phone. "I'm sorry."

"Sans..." He heard a sigh. Papyrus' tone wasn't scolding, just... tired. Disappointed.

Hurt.

"I really am sorry. Please don't be mad." Another sigh escaped the receiver.

"Sans, it's okay. Stay where you are, I'm going to tell everyone that you're okay."

"...'Everyone'? Who's that include?" A telltale beep sounded from Sans' phone, telling of another call.

Toriel.

"Well...." Papyrus tapped his finger against the phone. "Toriel, Undyne, Mettaton, and Grillby. Alphys probably knows, too."

Shit.

The entire Underground knew about that stunt.

"Sans, you- you sound like you're hyperventilating. Is everything alright?"

"Oh- um, yeah. Everything's alright, don't worry about me."

"It's a little late for that."

"Heh, sorry, Papyrus."

"Don't be. We'll talk later."

"Bye, Papyrus."

"Goodbye, Sans."

He hung up with a sigh, waiting a few seconds.

Toriel called, and Sans answered.

"Sans? Are you okay? Last I heard Papyrus was calling frantically and going on about how you were-"

"Tori, chill. 'M alright. Don't know what came over me."

"...Sans, please do not act as if this was a random occurrence."

"Eheh. You got me there. But, I'm fine now. I'm at home, just called Papyrus to let him know I'm alright. I'm feelin' a lot better now. Don't worry about it." Sans heard a crackle, indicating a soft sigh of relief. 

"If you are sure. If you ever want to talk to me, Sans, you know you can call me." Sans shrugged.

"Yeah. Thanks."

"Goodbye, Sans."

"Later, Tor."

He hung his phone up again. Scrolling through his phone's homescreen, he could see all the notifications he got.

37 unread texts.

48 unviewed voicemails.

Shit.

He opened and unlocked his voicemail... the first was from Papyrus.

_Sans I just read your note and *hic* where are you please pick up-_

It cut off. The next one played, just after Sans decided to save the message.

_Sans I can't- I can't find you- Where *hic* are you..._

He erupted into sobs before the voicemail cut off.

He saved it.

The next one was from Grillby.

_Sans, Papyrus has informed me that you've gone out to try and.. hurt yourself. ... ... Please, if you hear this... ... Please come back home._

He saved it.

_Sans, please come home. I don't know what I'd do in the bar without you. I'm very worried, and- scared._

He saved it. He saved all of them. 

The next one was from Toriel.

_Sans, Papyrus is worried out of his mind about you. What is going on?_

Toriel.

_Sans.... please don't hurt yourself._

Papyrus.

_Sans! It's been more than an hour! PLEASE COME BACK! PLEASE._

He felt horrible listening to these.

The next twenty were from Papyrus, Toriel and Grillby, with he same content.

Next, was the first one Undyne left. 

_Sans, everyone is so worried about you. Just... go home. Get help. Talk to someone, dammit._

Then from Grillby. This one, Sans wouldn't forget for the rest of his life.

_Sans, I had better not have been the last person to see you alive._

Three more from Undyne, telling him to go home, demanding he get help, then begging him to be okay.

The next... was from an unfamiliar number.

_Sans darling, it's Mettaton! Alphy, Undyne and Pappy are... are all very worried about your well-being, and- so am I. Please get home safely, I care about you very much. Talk to me if you need to, darling! Please. Goodbye._

Mettaton also left his number, and then two more voicemails.

Another unrecognized number, but the numbers were like deja vu for Sans.

_U-uh! Hi! Sans! P-Papyrus and Undyne t-told me about what was... going on. And... if you h-hear this! I j-just wanted to say... *sigh* Look. Sans. N-no matter how worthless you f-feel, you have friends who love you. W-we all love you. Go home, Sans._

Alphys. That was the only voicemail she left.

Two more from Papyrus, begging him to come home. 

Three more from Mettaton, with wishes that he be safe.

Five from Grillby, some of them kinda crackly and incoherent.

The last two from Toriel.

The texts contained the same content, just without Toriel.

He sighed and tossed his phone down, just as the front door opened. He could hear his brother calling his name.

He didn't want to do this, but he had to. 

He slowly stood, making his way to the door. He turned the handle, pushing it open so he could step out.

"Hey, Papyrus."

The taller skeleton's head snapped up towards the sound.

"Sans thank god! Get down here!!"

Sans obliged, pushing his hands in his pockets as he came down the stairs. Papyrus pulled him into a tight hug, picking him up off the ground. Sans couldn't help but hug back. He heard Papyrus take in a deep breath, and let it out before he let the other down. He still never released him from the hug.

"Sans, it's-..."

"... It's what?"

He felt Papyrus stiffen.

Oh no.

"Sans, who is that behind you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA


	3. Cry for Him, Cry for You.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr is jedjubeed.tumblr.com, my beta's is we-can-start-over.tumblr.com (18+ warning on that tumblr)

"Sans, who is that behind you?" Papyrus took a step back, pulling Sans close to his body in a protective manner.

"Who's what- woah. Chill out a little. There's nothing there." 

"There is a man. He's... taller than me. I can see him right there. He's wearing a black sweater and a lab coat." Gaster. 

"Pap, I'm sure you're just tired and a little bit in shock. You might be seeing things."

Papyrus looked down to Sans before letting him go, looking back up. The man was gone.

"I guess you were right. But, there was something familiar about him. I just can't recall why."

"Probably a weird deja vu thing." Sans shrugged, sitting down on the couch. Papyrus shook it off, before going to join the other.

"....Anyway," Papyrus started, tapping his fingers against his knee.

"Yeah?" Sans looked up. He knew he deserved what was coming.

"Sans, you know we all care about you."

"Got quite a few voicemails about that."

"Sans, you need to be- ... We want you to be serious about this. Please." Sans sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"Who is 'we', Papyrus? And what makes you think I _haven't_ been serious about this? I tried to throw myself off a cliff for stars' sake!" Papyrus was stunned into silence. Maybe Sans said a bit too much?

"When I say 'we', I don't mean the royal We. I mean Alphys, and Undyne, and Toriel, and Grillby, and everyone who _cares about you._ " Sans glanced away. Papyrus hunched his shoulders. "I wish you would have talked to me. I don't know what took you away from me- away from _us_ , but I want the old Sans back," He took in a breath. "Do you remember? Back when you laughed at your own jokes. When you said that you were still going to the lab that day, even though you had been up all night working on whatever it is when you were working on. Back when you would do anything just to see people around you smiling.

"Does it mean nothing to you any more to go back to how we all knew you?" Papyrus looked to the other, almost desperately. Sans stood up, digging the heels of his hands into his eye sockets.

"Papyrus, do you want to know _why_ I'm not like that any more?" He dropped his hands to his sides, to stare at the other. Funny, they were almost at the same height now. Pity no one was laughing. "I got _everything_ taken away from me, and I had to sit back and watch it happen. I couldn't do jack shit about it when that huge ass accident happened at the lab."

"You- said you got over that a long time ago."

"Well _I lied._ You wanna know what families do? They lie about the things the other people don't wanna hear. You didn't need to know that I'm still not over most of the fucking team getting slaughtered because of my stupidity! And not to mention I threw the job in the face of the _intern_ , who didn't even know how to use half the stuff that was there for her, even though it was supposed to be _my_ title. Apparently I couldn't handle it, and I still can't go in there without- without- ugh." He grunted, rubbing at his right eye.

Papyrus remained quiet as he listened to all that.

"I- Okay. Breathe for a few seconds, start at the beginning when the accident happened. Who died?"

"Dr. Gaster, Bikeaby, Kenny and Jawbone. All of them."

"Can you explain who they were to you?"

"Jawbone and I were just friends who went out for drinks a couple times. Bikeaby and I were pals, we smoked weed together a few times," Papyrus gave him a disapproving look but didn't dare interrupt. "And Kenny was kinda the one that stuck us all together. Had a huge crush on Dr. Gaster and was a huge suck-up to him all the time even though he didn't have a chance."

"Dr. Gaster was the Royal Scientist?"

"We were an item for a while. No one seems to remember _him,_ so I wouldn't expect you to. He moved in with us after a while, we... got engaged." Papyrus sighed sadly, rubbing his mouth.

"And then?"

"There was a buildup of magic in the Core. So, smart as I am, I decided, _hey, let's burn it._ Great idea. Worked for like, a month. It didn't burn all of it, and the Core ended up blowing up while the four were in it. Alphys and I were left. Of course, by then, I was Gaster's right hand man and the King's second referral, and I was to take the place of Gaster. Third most well-known name in The Underground, and still pretty well-known name to this day. I just don't use it.

"I-I couldn't handle it. Everyone was gone, it was just me and the intern that'd worked there a month before everything fell apart in our hands. I walked away without another word, and she was the Royal Scientist by process of elimination. She only built Mettaton to prove that she was worthy of it, her story is actually bullshit. If she hadn't have built that robot, I would have been forced into position by the king," He rubbed he back of his neck. "It's still awkward between Asgore and I."

"Why didn't you... tell me? About all this?" Sans chuckled.

"That's not the only thing in concern here."

"Is it about the lab?"

"Nope. Actually," Sans glanced out the window. "This story begins two days ago. For you. See, there's a human in The Underground. Right now they're still in the Ruins. This afternoon they'll come through that big purple door."

"I don't see why you-" Sans decided to interrupt.

"There's more. You know how in games or something you're able to reset everything and no one remembers? The kid is... somehow able to do that. And I remember everything they've done."

"Well hopefully they've made good decisions." Sans let out a dry laugh.

"Good decisions? Papyrus, take a guess at how many times I've seen that thing kill you."

"You're getting off topic-"

"No, no, really. Take a guess."

"Hmmn, two?"

"Ten. I've seen that little bastard kill you ten times. And that's not including where they go around _looking for monsters to kill._ They kill everyone that didn't make it out in time, Papyrus."

"How, uh.. many times did that happen?" His voice made him sound like he was so much smaller than he was. It was sickening.

"I- I stopped counting. That's the only time I'll actually fight them."

"In your state? Sans, why would you fight someone like that! You only have ONE HP!"

"Most times, actually, I kill them enough times as to where they just give up. I've had them die at my hands hundreds of times over." I sounds like something a monster like Sans would be proud of, but he didn't look too proud of what he'd done to that human. "They're just- just a kid, Pap, I didn't want to. I couldn't afford not to care any more." Papyrus looked down, sighing.

"I think that's enough talking for one night. Anything else you want to say?"

"Other than the fact that I legitimately can't function during linear time, I'd say no." Papyrus looked up and raised a brow, opening his arms.

"That's enough talking for one night," Sans sighed and walked over, burying himself into the larger skeleton much like a child would do to their mother.

"Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bikeaby, jawbone, and kenny are portrayed as gaster's followers in the game  
> bikeaby is the cat with the face holes  
> jawbone is the head in he ground  
> kenny is the one in MTT that was consuming dew off the ficus  
> i just like to think they were all friendly friends working at the lab that only sometimes had screaming matches
> 
> hoooo boy. ok, guess who's FRESH OUT OF IDEAS! (i'm literally bullshitting my way through these fics guys.) so, lemme know in the comments what you guys wanna see, and i'll add those to how the story progresses/how it ends!


	4. Unsteady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> my tumblr, again, is jedjubeed.tumblr.com and my amazing beta reader's is we-can-start-over.tumblr.com (18+ warning on that tumblr)

Sans woke up the next morning tucked into his bed, his sheets pulled out of that big crusty ball, the bed actually made. Weird, he didn't remember doing that. Papyrus probably did it. He shifted a bit under the sheets and sat up in the bed, yawning. Wow, it was strange sleeping with an actual blanket.

He untangled him from the now messed-up lump of sheets he'd kicked down to the end of the bed and straightened up his clothes, running his hands down his face.  Well, the one thing that would make him feel better would be coffee, but Papyrus didn't usually make it, and he didn't really wanna bother. Oh well. He exited his room and made his way to the stairs, before he glanced over the banister and down into the living room.

Why are there so many people there.

"H-hey, Sans!"

"Finally up, lazybones?"

"....Good morning."

"Oh, hello Darling!"

"Hello, Brother! I invited your friends over because they were worried about you, and wanted to see you!!"

He could practically feel his non-existent heart sinking into his non-existent stomach.

"Oh, uh, hey guys." Internally sweating, he put on a smile as he walked down the stairs. Shit, was he shaking? No, he couldn't be. As soon as he hit the bottom step, the silence turned incredibly awkward.

Everyone just stood there for a few seconds.

".....Would you...like me to make some coffee, Sans?" He looked up to Grillby, who looked like he was just clawing for an excuse to get out of the room.

"Uh. Yeah, please." Grillby nodded, and walked into the kitchen.

"....I should, uh. Show him how the coffee maker works." He _almost_ used a shortcut in his rush to get past everyone, instead speed walking into the kitchen, letting out the breath he didn't really know he was holding. He heard some mumbling from the living room, but decided not to tune in.

"Sans.... I know how to use your coffee maker."

"I know, I just didn't really want to stand there with everyone staring at me like I'm insane."

"No one... thinks you're insane. We're just worried," Grillby said, glancing back to the skeleton.

"I know. And I'm really sorry," He rubbed his face. "I shouldn't have scared you all like that."

"...Why are you apologizing? That's our job."

"Why? You guys shouldn't have to apologize, this is all on me. This was my mistake, these are my problems, and it was my life I tried to end."

"It.. It was our mistake to not notice that... you were in so much pain... and you're my friend, I can't just... stand by and let you suffer..." Grillby hesitated for a few seconds, flames flickering. "You... wouldn't be the only one affected if you went through with it... I'm glad you changed your mind."

"See, that's the thing. I didn't actually change my mind at all." He paused to rub the back of his neck, staring down in thought.

"What...do you mean?" Grillby turned to look at him. Sans glanced at the doorway, his voice dropping.

"You... can't tell Papyrus about any of this. He'd freak." Moving to wrap his arms around himself, he looked to the opposite wall. "I uh. Actually jumped. You know that huge ass cliff in Waterfall? Yeah."

".....how are you.. alive?"

"I'd rather save that story for another time." And suddenly he heard a loud 'WHAT?!?!?!?' from the other room.

Oh, right. Undyne was still here.

"SANS! GET IN HERE AND EXPLAIN WHAT THE  _FUCK_ HAPPENED!!!"

"...That time being now. You should uh, probably come with me. You'll need to hear this."

Grillby nodded and followed Sans out of the room. Undyne looked enraged, and concerned. Alphys looked bewildered, Mettaton confused, and Papyrus, just...

God. He didn't want to look at Papyrus.

"...You. You KILLED FOUR INNOCENT MONSTERS." Undyne stomped over, jamming her finger against Sans' chest.

"......wait, what?" Grillby looked down at Sans. 

"Sans, y-you... Why?" Right, Alphys probably remembered them too.

"Hey, hey, woah. Let's not be too hasty."

"I can't BELIEVE this." Undyne straightened up, growling at Sans.

"Papyrus, what did you TELL them?"

"I- I just... Told them what you told me!!! About, The CORE?"

"Yeah, about how you blew it up with the four of them IN IT!!"

"Okay, everyone stop. The CORE blowing up was a complete accident, okay? It took months of magical buildup for it to even get to that point, and I had absolutely no idea that it was happening. Their deaths were an accident. Yeah, I know, it was technically my fault and I still hate that it happened, but there's nothing we can do about it now."

"You have almost no remorse for this, do you??" Undyne's face was starting to get flushed red with anger. Alphys walked over, to put a hand on his back.

"He-he's been through a l-lot, calm down."

"Yeah, thanks for making me feel welcome in my own home, guys." Glaring up at Undyne as he passed, he made is way over to sit next to Papyrus on the couch. 

"Sans, I- I'm sorry, I didn't know she would-"

"Papyrus. Calm down, it's okay." Undyne and Alphys were mumbling amongst each other, before they just decided to go to the kitchen to avoid having Undyne punch anyone in the face.

"Er, well, if you  _do_ regret having done that, then... They must have meant something to you, yes?" Mettaton was still hanging out near the staircase, and just now decided to speak up.

"Uh, yeah. Three our of the four were my friends and I was gonna get married to the fourth one. Kinda pisses me off how Undyne accused me of murdering them and then not caring."

Well, that about filled his sympathetic expression quota for the day. Sans let out a dry laugh.

"Man, it's like I'm cursed or something. I just ... Accidentally kill everyone that I care about."

"....Sans, that.... that can't be true."

He moved to rub his face and wow, he's crying. Ok. That was probably a first for everyone in the room besides Grillby.

"Say that to six people."

".......six? Who were... the other two?"

"My parents. I'm literally not even going to mention that I've seen most of you die at least four times." Mettaton just looked at Papyrus. He knew that look very well. Yes, the 'hey your brother is fucking insane why isn't he on medication or something' look was his favorite. 

"Darling, how is that-"

"The human kid." He shifted to glance out the window. "They should be here soon, actually. They've been through here plenty of times, whether they kill anyone or not is up to them. It's... actually kind of funny. They have what's called a file, they can save it, reset it, do whatever they please with it. But  _they can't actually die._ "

"Is.... is that what you were talking about when you mentioned... the resets?"

"Uh, yeah. Speaking of, I should actually get going - there's someone I need to talk to."

"Oh no you DON'T!" Surprise, Undyne's back.

"The hell do you mean?"

"We've decided that you can't go out alone any more! Because we  _clearly_ can't trust you with that."

"Funny story, I'm actually not-"

"...Sans, we worry. So..... at least let Papyrus go with you."

"You'll hardly know I'm there, brother!"

"....Yea, ok. One condition, though." He stood up, and stretched. "I can be alone in my room, and the basement. Some shit's dangerous down there, I don't want anyone getting hurt. And, I just don't like people in my room."

"Well if it's dangerous in your basement, why would we let you go down there alone?" Undyne, frankly, just looked pissed.

"......you could get hurt."

"One difference? I know what I'm doing down there, and you don't. Plus, if I'm working, you'd just get in the way. Plus I also don't like people going down there. I really don't want to lug someone around with me wherever I go. You'd get tired real fast."

"Oh, please!! All you do is SLEEP!" 

Sans shrugged.

"Ok, then you get to go to work with me. Might wanna get someone to fill in for you, I've got more than a few jobs." Grillby looked to be the only one that really knew anything about Sans, and it was likely because of all the shit Sans rambled about when he was drunk.

"Tch! Shouldn't be hard, I doubt you show up to any of your jobs."

"Ok," He stood up. "Papyrus, are you ready? There's someone I want you to meet."


	5. merry shitscram

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hAAAA i live 
> 
> merry crisis everyone enjoy this

Once everything was figured out, Sans started to lead Papyrus to the door in the woods that he found to be his only saving grace, weirdly enough. 

“Is she your girlfriend?”

“No, Pap, she’s not my girlfriend.”

“Oh! Well, you could have said so. Undyne assumed she was and called you ‘shallow’. It was quite rude!” Sans practically flinched. Shallow?

“Yeah well, Undyne assumes a lot of shit and calls me a lot of things.” 

“Language! Anywho, do you know her name?”   
“Yeah, we know each other.” Sans strolled up to the door, and knocked twice. “Knock, knock.” 

He waited for a few seconds. No response. He knocked again, and Papyrus gave him a look of concern. 

“Sans, is… is this lady… you know, is she real?” He practically choked on air.

“No- I mean- Yes, she’s real, of course she is! She left voicemails, I’ve got them in my phone!” He was shouting at this point. Sans had never been actively defensive, it must have been concerning. He wasn’t acting like himself lately. “...sorry, didn’t mean ta yell. She’s real, though, I swear. She’s… just not home right now. We can check this afternoon, though.”

“Well, sure? If you want to,” Papyrus made sure to quickly respond, smiling. 

“Anyway, you should prob’ly get to work. Sorry for wasting your time, heh. ‘Guess I’m gonna go to Grillby’s, don’t wait up for me.”

Papyrus looked wary, but Grillby and Sans were… close. Closer than Papyrus knew. He knew that, and he was okay with that. Sans was like that with a lot of people, like Alphys, and Asgore… He wondered, sometimes, what Sans knew and what his past was like. He’d ask someday.

“Okay, well….” Papyrus really didn’t approve of Grillby. But, alas, he knew they were… better than friends, even. Grillby knew more about Sans than anyone, probably. “Don’t be too long! You have to go to work at some point today-” Wait, shoot, don’t say that! Why would Sans want to go to work right now?  “I- mean!! If you want to-”

“Pap, calm down. I’m not just gonna skip work.” Papyrus just stood for a bit. That attitude would probably be why the bills got paid. Papyrus was suddenly reminded of the fact that Sans had way too many jobs. Papyrus was suddenly reminded that Sans was very, very overworked. 

That Sans really, really had problems. That Papyrus really, really didn’t know.

“Uh, hey, Pap? Ya look like you’re overthinkin’ stuff. ...so, uh, if ya got any questions,” Sans paused, “I’ll give ya a straight answer from now on. Promise.” Sans had only promised Papyrus one thing before, and he kept the promise. 

Papyrus nodded.

“Okay. Thank you.”

“Anyway, c’mon. Let’s get you to your station.” The brothers set off walking in a comfortable silence for many moments, before it was broken. 

“Sans, how do you know Asgore so well?” Papyrus asked, looking down to the other. The smaller skeleton didn’t answer for a few seconds. Eventually, he did.

“You sure you want the answer to that one?”

“Yes, Sans, that’s why  ased. Why are you so close to him? Not just everyone is that close to the king!”

“Political favors, bro. That’s why. He’s given me lots - least I can do is be his friend. “ 

“Well, what kinds of political favors has he given you?” Sans brought a hand up to rub at his left temple, bone against bone making a scraping sound. 

“Well, let’s see. Got me into college, cancelled my trial… prolly gave me a few pity grants.”

“Trial? What were you on  _ trial _ for?”

“Well, after the lab accident…” Sans sed his hands to gesture as he talked, “There wasn’t enough information to blame anyone for it, so they chalked it up to a jealousy murder by me. Asgore knows I was real shaken up about it, couldn’ta hurt a single one of ‘em, so he didn’t put me on the spot like that. Kinda fizzed out after a while, I guess. Gerson can give you more detail than that, he was sober for all of it,” Sans explained. He felt the ghosting presence of a hand on his shoulder once he was done talking.

“And he got you into college?”

“Yep, never finished high school, had ta take care of you. He offered me a free ride, but only if I was Gaster’s intern for all of it. I could go for as long as I wanted, too, but hadta keep my grades up. Eventually Gaster offered me a higher position, after I graduated with a doctorate.” The presence on his shoulder didn’t leave. He knew exactly what it was.

“So you and Asgore are friends?”

“Yeah, he’s a cool guy. Gave me my job as a judge, cause he knew no one else could do it.”

“Why couldn’t anyone else do it, then?”

“Well, my… magic gives me the ability to see the bad things people have done in the past.”

“That’s what EXP and LV are though. Right?”

“Sheesh, loadin’ up the questions. Nah, what I’m sayin’ is, I could tell if someone got in a fight and beat the hell out of someone, that type of thing.” The conversation dropped, as the two walked along. Sans waved goodbye to Papyrus when they got to his station. He took a shortcut to Grillby’s, stepped in, shut the door behind himself. He could already feel the glare of the patrons, just walking to the front. Everyone had a painfully awkward greeting for him, and he knew by the look on Grillby’s face that they knew, that someone told them. He felt the faint whisper of assurance against his skull as he got to his barstool.

“Huh. this agreement thing is really killin’ me. Haven’t got a second to myself,” Sans said, scratching the back of his neck.

“It’s… for your own good.”

“I know, heh, I just… sheesh, I’m actin; like a moody teenager.” Grillby waited a few seconds, before hunching up to sign so only Sans could see him. 

_ You can talk to me. _ It took Sans a few seconds to process the words. He hadn’t used sign in quite a while. 

_ I know. _ “Hey, I been doin’ this thing recently,” Sans added, “thought you might want in on it. You got a question, I’ll answer. Uh, honestly.”

“....thank you.” He didn’t feel Gaster’s hand on his back. The moment he realized this, he was terrified. 

He knew he couldn’t help Gaster any more, and Gaster knew this, too.

 

All of a sudden, Sans wanted to die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> merry chrysler


End file.
